1. Set a time and place for discussion.
2. Define the problem – Be specific.
3. List the ways you each contribute to the problem.
4. List past attempts to resolve the issue that were not successful.
5. Brainstorm—Pool your new ideas and try to list 10 possible solutions to the problem. Do not judge criticize any of the suggestions at this point.
6. Discuss and evaluate each of these possible solutions. (Be as objective as possible. Talk about how useful and appropriate each suggestion feels for resolving your issue.)
7. Agree on one solution to try.
8. Agree how you will each work toward this solution. (Be as specific as possible.)
9. Set up another meeting to discuss your progress.
Place: Date: Time:
10. Reward each other for progress. (If you notice your partner making a positive contribution toward the solution, praise his/her effort.)